I remember the day we met for the first time. It was on myspace, of all places. You added me as a friend and messaged me and said "hey what's up?" and told you me you live close by and were good friends with a good friend of mine. I was a little hesitant to talk to you because I didn't know you, but you seemed harmless enough, and I figured there was nothing wrong with making new friends, so I messaged you back and we became acquainted. After that we talked on msn messenger nearly every night and kept in contact through text messages during the day. Our friendship grew stronger and stronger each day. We shared stories about our lives, and told each other things we couldn't talk about with anyone else. We were both going through difficult times back then and it was nice to have someone to talk to. I told you about my situation with my boyfriend. About how I didn't feel like I had good chemistry with him, but didn't have the courage to break up with him because he really liked me. You gave me good advice, about how I needed to be true to my heart even if it might hurt my boyfriend and how it wasn't fair to my bf that I was staying with him when I just wanted to be friends.
I remember the day you called me on the phone for the first time. Your voice sounded a lot like I had imagined it would. I was very quiet on the phone and I felt really stupid because our conversation was kind of awkward due to my shyness. But I felt much better when you confessed to me later that day on messenger that you were worried that I was being quiet because I thought you were weird. But I thought the complete opposite of you. You were different than any guy I had ever met. And I didn't want to admit it at the time, but I was really beginning to like you.
The next day was new years eve. I was at my aunt and uncles house celebrating with my family, and you were hanging out at a friends house. We were talking online when the countdown to midnight started and you told me something completely unexpected. You said that for your new years resolution you wanted to be more honest about how you feel, and that you felt like you were falling for me. I was so excited because I felt the same way. But I didn't know what to say because I had a bf. So I decided to be honest too. I said something like "I think I'm starting to feel the same way...but you know that I have a boyfriend." You said something like "I know, I can wait."
I finally got up the courage to break up with my boyfriend. I remember feeling terrible because he was upset, but I knew that it was for the best, and I knew that I couldn't deny my feelings for you. We started talking alot more on the phone and a few days later we decided that it was time we should finally meet in person. I was so nervous about meeting you, I was worried that you wouldn't like me, or you would think I was too shy for you. When you arrived at my house and I opened the door to meet you, I had to look up because you're huge, like 6ft 4in, and I remember the first thing you said "Wow, you really are short." It made me laugh, and we left to go to your aunt and uncles house to watch a movie together. On the ride over I remember thinking that you were a lot cuter in person, I had only seen a couple pictures of you before.
When we got to your aunt and uncles, we started watching the movie "Boondock Saints." I couldn't really focus on the movie because I was thinking of you the entire time. I was hoping that you would reach over and take my hand, and as if you could read my mind, you did. After the movie you showed me around the house. You had just got done showing me some of your cousins artwork and we were about to leave the room when you stopped, pulled me closer to you and we kissed. We kissed for what seemed like hours until it was time for me to leave.
I came and saw you the next day before you left to go back to your house. You kept hinting that you wanted me to be your girlfriend and you finally asked me if I wanted to be with you. I honestly had to think about it for a second because I was dealing with one of my ex boyfriends at the time who was very controlling of me and wanted to get back together with me. But I decided that I would do what my heart was telling me to do and I said "Yes!" And once again, you said something very unexpected. "I love you." And I said without really thinking "I love you too." (Honestly at the time, I think we both kind of just blurted it out without thinking.)
After that, our relationship moved very quickly..too quickly. We got along great, but kept pushing me further than I was willing to go. I tried to explain that I wasn't "that kind of girl" and even though you promised me many to respect that, you broke each promise every time. I felt like you didn't care about me enough to keep your promises to me and it began to weaken my feelings for you. And the more I distanced myself from you, the tighter you tried to cling to me. And the tighter you clung to me, the more I wanted to get away. You weren't treating me with the respect I deserved and you were often immature and selfish about your decisions. I decided that we needed to take a break because I needed time to figure out what I wanted. Months passed, and you were still hoping I would come back to you, but after considering and reconsidering, I made my decision final, and we broke up. We both tried to move on the best we could, but I had to admit, I missed you and still had feelings for you and couldn't stand to see you with someone else, and I knew you felt the same.
But after the break up, I noticed a change beginning to take place in you. It became apparent that you realized what you had lost and began to mature more and be more respectful of my decisions and put me first. I found myself wanting to be around you more often and I began thinking of giving "us" another shot. 6 months after the breakup I found myself needing a date to the Christmas dance. You asked me if I would go with you and I said yes. We had a long conversation that night. You said that if we got back together that things would be different this time, and that we couldn't spend the rest of our lives wishing that we had taken the chance at love when we had it. And so I said yes. And I think you might have been the happiest guy on earth that night.
This time around, we took our relationship much slower. And you kept your word to me, and eventually we fell in love all over again, but this time, it was for real. I can honestly say that I am glad I gave you another chance. I feel like I get closer and closer to you each day. I can never seem to get you off of my mind. Your love fills up all the empty places in my heart that used to leave me feeling hollow inside. As strange as it may sound I truly believe that fate brought us together the day you decided to message me on myspace. And I'm really glad it did.
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